Well mother-in-law is depressed and I feel terrible for her. I know I cannot control her happiness and there is nothing I can do to make her happier, I just feel awful. Both of her parents died this fall and she's been a wreck ever since, especially because this is her first Christmas and birthday (12-27) without them.
She knows we're ttc, and knows we're having trouble. She has said, I just need a baby in the family, it would be like new life, and something to look forward to, where now she has nothing going on and nothing to look forward to. I know her and I know that even if we were to get pregnant, she would find something else to complain about and be sad about, like how we live 500 miles away and how she doesn't want to be a long distance Grandma. But what does she expect?! There is no work in Michigan and it really doesn't make sense to leave a stable, excellent paying job. Jack would take AT LEAST a $10/hr paycut to move back to Michigan. IF we could even find a job there. Plus we like it here.
Ugh, why am I doing this to myself. I am not responsible for her happiness. I cannot contribute to her being happier or sadder. She makes her own circumstances what they are. I lost 3 out of 4 of my grandparents and an aunt all in two years and I'm not beside myself with greif.
I don't like the added pressure.
I don't even want to THINK about ttc any more at this point.
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2 comments:
((hugs))Allie you don't need the extra pressure and don't let her mood affect your happiness!
aw maggie thanks
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