I'm so sick of fighting with Jack.
It's been almost 3 years since he proposed... which coincidentally means that it's been 3 years minus one day since the switch flipped in his brain about how he was going to treat me.
I know he's working on it and I know it's a big adjustment but I just hate my life sometimes with how he treats me. He acts like he doesn't even like me any more... and he doesn't like me any more because I'm not the same girl I was when we were dating, and I'm not that girl any more because he hurt me so much since we got engaged. It's a vicious cycle and I am powerless over it.
I know things will get better, especially because Jack wants them to get better and I DEFINITELY do.
I just want that super handsome, super sweet guy back that I said yes to marrying... because I haven't seen him since the day he proposed.
I see glimpses of him every now and then, but he doesn't stay around for long. I WANT HIM BACK.
*sigh*
I gotta go sew.
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I'm sorry, Allie. I know the feeling. Everyone changes though, and that's what keeps life interesting...unfortunately it can also make life a huge PITA.
Hopefully Jack will realize what he's doing and make an effort to change it.
I think a lot of guys have a "courting" mode. They're super sweet and do all sorts of nice things for you, and then once they have you they don't think they need to do that anymore and they lose the "courting" mode.
I have talked with Shawn about this too because I tend to feel like I don't come first anymore. It's always work, his computer games, his parents, "so and so needs their car fixed" and I keep getting shoved further and further back out of the way yet he expects me to always be there when he finally comes looking for me.
Maybe you could write him a letter...try to calmly explain how you feel in a letter? That way if you start getting all mad you can tear it up and start over but you don't "blow up at him." Unfortunately Shawn tends to only hear me when I'm screaming at him and then he acts all surprised like it came out of nowhere even when it's something I've talked with him about over and over. Sometimes the letter thing works though so it may be worth a try... Just a thought.
I really hope that he is willing to put in an effort to change how he has been treating you. I hope your sewing project is going well.
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